After the loss of a loved one, whether it be your spouse, friend, or family member, many people try to move on quickly. They believe that if they pretend it never happened and stay as busy as possible, the pain of the event will subside without much discomfort.
Unfortunately, this is not the best way to heal, and it can have serious emotional and mental repercussions. The only way to heal from the loss of a loved one is to mourn.
Feel the Pain
It can be difficult to face the pain of losing someone you care about deeply. This person may have been with you regularly throughout your life. Now, there’s an empty space in your life without that person. You may not feel the same about life because of that missing piece of your life. This can be devastating for you.
Allow it to devastate you.
There’s nothing wrong with feeling the pain. It will not destroy you. However, it will help you process what happened much more healthfully. As human beings, we are programmed to feel emotions when things happen in life. Ignoring that normal reaction to life can end up causing serious problems.
What problems can arise from ignoring the natural mourning process?
You could end up suffering from depression. When you bury powerful emotions in your subconscious, they do not go away. They remain there and get bigger and bigger. Internally, you are dealing with those emotions, and without venting them, they just accumulate. This leads to bodily stress unbeknownst to you, which can wreak havoc on your physical and mental health.
When you express and work through the pain you are feeling, your body is able to feel a release. That release leads to reduced stress levels. Reduced stress levels mean your body can work better when it comes in contact with other stressors.
The Length of Time for Mourning
There is no magical number of days, weeks, months, or years to heal from the death of a loved one. Everyone deals with death in a different way. Some people will process the loss in just a couple of days, while others will still deal with the pain two years after it occurred. No one should judge another person’s mourning time.
With that being said, never feel as though there’s something wrong with you because you are not “over it” yet. Also, don’t rush your mourning just so others don’t think you are dwelling on it too much.
You deserve to dwell on the loss of your loved one for as long as you need to for healthy healing.
Take a few minutes today to think about how you mourned the loss of your loved one. Did you give yourself the time you needed? If not, you can start to work on that mourning. It’s likely those sad feelings are deep inside of you. Letting that sadness surface and releasing it means you’ll feel much better emotionally, mentally, and physically.
If you’re unsure how you’re going to get through the pain, contact me. I’m a personal consultant who works with people who are mourning the loss of their loved one or are trying to process unresolved feelings about the death. Call or email me today to start mourning the way you should to feel better and continue life in a much better place. Your loved one would have wanted that for you.
Image courtesy of Serge Bertasius free FreeDigitalPhotos.net