What to Do When You Catch Yourself Saying “I Am So Lonely”

What to Do When You Catch Yourself Saying “I Am So Lonely”

What to Do When You Catch Yourself Saying “I Am So Lonely”Loneliness is a hard feeling to deal with at any age, especially during retirement. Throughout your life, there were probably times when you wanted some peace. You may have had so many people around you that you yearned for time to yourself. At that time, loneliness would have been a welcomed retreat from life.

Now, loneliness is something very different. It feels wrong and uncomfortable. You want to be fine with it, but you cannot and that is unnerving. What can you do when you find yourself saying, “I am so lonely?” Keep reading.

What to Do About Loneliness

A certain amount of loneliness is good for you. It should help you collect your thoughts and plan for the days ahead. It should allow you time to dream, which can make you feel great about yourself and life. Loneliness becomes a problem when you start feeling despair. Despair means you want to be around people, but there is no one around you. In addition, you do not know what to do to bring people in your life or you do not think you can. This can make you feel defeated.

The following tips can help you fight the loneliness you feel.

  • It is time to expand your social circle. Meeting new people can be difficult when you get older. There are not as many opportunities to do that as there were when you were younger, but that does not mean there are no possibilities. The best way to find new people to spend time with is to engage in activities you enjoy. For example, if you enjoy bowling, you should see about joining a league. If you enjoy playing golf, see if there are groups or clubs at a local golf course. Since you already enjoy doing those activities, you are already half way to not feeling lonely.
  • Find new activities to enjoy. You have probably been doing the same things for years. It may be time to find new activities to spark your enthusiasm. Search the Internet for crafts, projects, etc. that you believe would be fun. Depending on your personality, you may want to find little things to do or projects that take more time that you can work on for days or weeks. Find what works for you and if it takes you a few tries of different crafts and hobbies to find what you love, that is okay.
  • Come up with a schedule. Loneliness comes from boredom. To prevent feeling bored, come up with a schedule to follow each day. Start with when you wake up and plan something to do throughout the day. If you cannot think of enough things to do, start adding things such as the crafts, hobbies, and social time.
  • Become more active. Taking walks is an excellent way to keep yourself healthy AND use up some of that time that you are feeling lonely. Check with local gyms and senior centers to find out if there are any walking groups. If there are, join one. If there are none, go ahead and see if you can start one.

As you know, when you are presented with a situation you do not like, it is important to do something about it. If you do nothing, you will continue to feel the same way.

If you need additional help for your loneliness, contact Kendall Van Blarcom. He is a personal consultant who works with senior citizens and their caregivers. He can help you find out why you feel this way, and how you can keep yourself from feeling that way in the future.

Contact him here now for help.

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To provide improved mental health support for seniors, education, and motivation to individuals having difficulty with life’s challenges, and to empower them to turn their life around so they can improve it with positive changes that will greatly influence their thoughts, feelings, and actions for the rest of their life.

Kendall E. Van Blarcom, Psy.M. Licensed Psychotherapist (Retired)


Please note: I do not offer the services of a virtual counselor, therapist or geriatric psychologist. Online personal consulting is not intended to take the place of traditional face-to-face therapy, clinical assessment or treatment.

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